Scratch
Original Release Date: 03/09/6651 (1651 AM)
The playful cover of Scratch's 6651 album SNIFF was, contrary to popular opinion, not an accident. Well, it was an accident, in actuality, a photo snapped at the exact moment that the band was vaporized by a NoortalNet Portal Jumper, a common apparatus that allowed intergalactic and interdimensional travel with ease. The band, fronted by Dewelsian dreamboat Roqqo Zantilly, was prone to foolish errands in between tour stops. The album that became SNIFF had already been completed several months earlier, originally titled Beats Me, with a delightful cover depicting the members smashing a cardboard cutout of Lord Prosect. One night, after a wild performance at the Goolark Arena on Goobonia XII, they decided to take a portal jump to the sunny beaches of Marble Island in the Sun Belt of Orion. Feeling a tad anxious to leave the raving fans and their lust for autographs, they all piled into the jumper as a goof, waving furiously at their manager to take a photo of their shenanigans. Unfortunately, they were unaware that his NoortalNet product was meant not for creatures but for cargo, and anything less was to be incinerated. Because of the confined space, a hoof accidentally tapped the release button, and before the scanner could even finish humming, the band had been eliminated. Their manager's camera flashed, and the colorful scratches left behind in the black cloud of their ashes were all that remained. The posthumous album they left behind is pure and classic Scratch material. Clipping bass switched in and out underneath roaring snare while multiple synthesizers built a crescendo of fast-paced, single-issue melodies. They were down and dirty, totally in control of the chaos. The lead single, Portal Jumping, had been written to highlight their crazy days and nights basking in the interdimensional travel, stealing drinks, playing tricks, and remembering the nearly two decades they had all known each other. Bassist Jyreteco Zantilly, Roqqo's brother, had been a late addition to the band, though he had been part of the group since his egg had hatched, and a replacement that night for original bassist Yorbo Yorbona, who vanished soon after the accident. Some say the guilt drove him mad and that an insane asylum became his final destination. There were court cases, of course, and everyone counter-sued everyone else. It was a nightmare of paperwork, and the album and band were pushed to the wayside so heavy hitters could collect their insurance and profit from their death. The songs on SNIFF, retitled due to the smell emanating from the interior of the portal jumper, were a time capsule of Roqqo's genius, cementing his melodies among the equally loud and fast. The snapshot they provide is of a group so in sync, destined for so much more. Haunting reverb carries some of the most heart-wrenching beats, though they were never meant to be, elevating them, without true purpose, into a twisting double- or triple-meaning that we will never know the reasons for. In a way, the mystery of SNIFF is part of the experience. What did Roqqo intend to convey? Did the tragedy of the band's untimely demise alter how we view them? Or do the songs stand alone as a testament to who they truly were? Sharpen your nails and dig in, dear Audionauts, and take a mighty whiff of the tasty beats that always were and never will be.
Side A
Enough About...!
Portal Jumping
Itchin'
Look At What We Have Here
Side B
Beats Me
Not Like I Care
Pry It From My Cold, Dead Hooves
Get Bent (Out of Shape)