[GAME OVER] were students of the Gilded Age of Video Games, conquering classics such as Geemo-Man V, The Disappearance of Pronto Xevon, Medal of Quartonn, and the ever-evolving Ark of Fate (and its fifteen expansion packs). They are also, unfortunately, veterans of two Funk Wars (III & IV). Suddenly, these quirky games lacked the same excitement; too simple, now; too flinching.

On July 20, 1969, Earthlings Neil Armstrong and Edwin Eugene Aldrin Jr. became the first of their kind to set foot on the barren wasteland of their nearest moon (nicknamed: Moon). While the planet cheered (close to three-quarters of a billion creatures tuned in from Earth, via the Milky Way Galaxy), the Universe laughed.

For their slender, outward appearance, 1st Kind were not, as some theorized, Martians. They were part of the race of creatures known as the Qetareti, perhaps a precursor to those who colonized Mars, though they were often confused nonetheless.

Felton Pingüino had a fantastic fear of nearly everything in his environment. Car horn too loud? Shadow a bit too menacing? Food too spicy? Whether it was the buzzing of a fly or the shock of a thunderstorm, Felton retreated under his bed, using his cartoon-themed blankets to block the bottom of the frame and insulate himself from the outside world.

Ten years, almost to the day, from the release of their heel-turn on Row Bot, The Swamp King Jam roared (or ribbited) back into the mainstream with a trippy hop into another dimension. Inspired by their experience in the sun-soaked valleys and fly-infested streets of Frogopolis, it was a landmark (and an extended stay) that changed the band forever.

The fortuitous meeting of the trio of Cirrus, Poly, and Siks occurred entirely by mistake. At an interstellar diner (part of the Bartlebee's chain), Cirrus had busted his behind washing dishes for nearly a decade. As a seven-armed mollusk, he was the right invertebrate for the job, but how was he to advance in this business if he was always thought of as merely a cog in the machine (the machine here being piping-hot, quality meals at affordable prices)?

The fortuitous meeting of the trio of Cirrus, Poly, and Siks occurred entirely by mistake. At an interstellar diner (part of the Bartlebee's chain), Cirrus had busted his behind washing dishes for nearly a decade. As a seven-armed mollusk, he was the right invertebrate for the job, but how was he to advance in this business if he was always thought of as merely a cog in the machine (the machine here being piping-hot, quality meals at affordable prices)?

The fortuitous meeting of the trio of Cirrus, Poly, and Siks occurred entirely by mistake. At an interstellar diner (part of the Bartlebee's chain), Cirrus had busted his behind washing dishes for nearly a decade. As a seven-armed mollusk, he was the right invertebrate for the job, but how was he to advance in this business if he was always thought of as merely a cog in the machine (the machine here being piping-hot, quality meals at affordable prices)?

Death Masque was known for their cheeky self-portrayal: mixing language and cover art that expressed a much darker product, but underneath lived a bright, punchy, and dreamy language. This trend did not stop with their 2683 album Incorrupt Tongue, a surprisingly grim love note to those who had failed to decay. Dotted with poppy melodies floating above underground rhythm, it was a small turning point in their sonic journey.

Wishing for immortality and being immortal have been proven to be two entirely different beasts. To experience time unimpeded and witness the rise and fall of it all, to be the stone foundation of the long, long ago and the soothsayer of the future has its benefits (admiration, endorsements, and the occasional game show appearance).

People of Earth! Have no fear. I am Pizza Bear of New Bear City. I come in peace…and in 30 minutes or less, or it’s free! I am here to tell you my story, just one in a city of millions, in a Universe of trillions. At a young age, I was orphaned when my parents died in a car crash. A semi-truck filled with marmalade t-boned a truck full of honey, and the rest was crystallized.

The playful cover of Scratch's 6651 album SNIFF was, contrary to popular opinion, not an accident. Well, it was an accident, in actuality, a photo snapped at the exact moment that the band was vaporized by a NoortalNet Portal Jumper, a common apparatus that allowed intergalactic and interdimensional travel with ease.

Intergalactic travel can be quite the pain: long lines; subpar service; bumpy black holes. We do not envy those who must zip back and forth between star systems each day, either for business or pleasure. The space traveler's most trusted tool, besides an extra roll of toilet paper, is access to The Intergalactic Weather Channel. A staple of any cockpit, the IWC was legendary for its Accu-Weather forecasting and vast knowledge of nearly every planet, galaxy, and star field in the Universe.

Throughout the Intergalactic Beets Project, dear Audionauts, there are numerous cases of mismanagement among bands. From Nedley Femtome and Colonel Snow Barkman to Sad Dog and Mad Dog Shea, a maniacal manager can be the final nail in a career destined for greatness. DOOT! (Oxiqlickians Jormo and Sweeze) were another in a long line of up-and-comers taken advantage of by negligent greed.